Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Searching for balance

Day 35.

Today was a good day. Nothing overwhelming fabulous happened. Nothing overwhelming tragic happened, but everything in between and everything manageable. Lately, I'm trying to find balance at home. Balance of enough housecleaning, enough playing with my kids, enough cooking, enough laundry, enough picking up all the crap that gets distributed throughout the house on an hourly basis. So, today was pretty balanced in all of those areas.

I am grateful for relative balance.

But even so, I am constantly questioning myself - feeling like I didn't give ENOUGH time to anything - especially the kids (even though I'm talking to them, playing with them, managing them ALL DAY LONG). I think I'm too much of a multi-tasker. I know I have to be with all that has to be accomplished, but still. This evening I noticed Dylan glancing back several times as she rode her push bike down the hall to see if I was still watching. I guess she is used to me saying, "Ok, I'll watch" and then trying to do fifteen other things WHILE I'm watching something she's doing. That's the kind of thing that makes me feel terrible. But I just have such a hard time just BEING and listening and watching and enjoying anything if I can possibly do two (or three) other things at once.

Any ideas on how I can better manage my time and tasks?
For now, I'm still grateful for the balance I did find today.

1 comment:

  1. I feel this way ALL the time. I catch myself not noticing things I should have or realizing that Anya asked me to do something a LONG time ago and she finally just gave up on me and did something else. It is a horrible feeling. It is so hard to find this balance at any given moment, but nearly impossible to maintain all day long. You're not alone...no amazing solutions here, but would love to talk about it anytime. Love you.

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